Jump to content

Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Assessment/SMS Schlesien

Add links
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Article promoted Hawkeye7 (talk) 08:13, 7 May 2013 (UTC)[reply]

SMS Schlesien[edit]

Nominator(s): Parsecboy (talk)


Yet another German battleship here at ACR (the light is visible at the end of the tunnel, though, since of the rest, probably only the "Ugly Sisters" will end up here - after that, who knows!). In any case, thanks to all editors who review the article, I look forward to working with you during the review process. Parsecboy (talk) 20:13, 19 April 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Support

  • Structure, coverage, referencing and supporting materials (incl. image licensing) appear good to me.
  • Made my usual prose edits so pls check I haven't misinterpreted or broken anything. Only one remaining query: Schlesien could barely make out a target in the darkness, as could several of her sisters -- the expression confuses me, do we mean that her sisters could or could not make out targets?

Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 23:56, 27 April 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments. As always, feel free to revert my copyediting. Please check the edit summaries. - Dank (push to talk)

  • "pre-dreadnought", "post-Dreadnought": Your call, but it seems inconsistent. - Dank (push to talk) 23:24, 28 April 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    • Reworded the sentence to avoid that construction - how does it look now? Parsecboy (talk) 00:21, 29 April 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Her armored belt was 240 mm (9.4 in) thick amidships and a 40 mm (1.6 in) thick armored deck.": Something's missing.
  • Support on prose per standard disclaimer. These are my edits. - Dank (push to talk) 00:26, 29 April 2013 (UTC)[reply]

A few comments you may want to consider by MisterBee1966 (talk) 16:40, 1 May 2013 (UTC)[reply]

  • Ordered under the letter "R"; HRS volume 7 page 125
  • christened by Fürstin Mathilde von Pless, speech by de:Robert von Zedlitz-Trützschler Oberpräsident of Selisia page 125
  • "She was laid down on 19 November 1904 at the AG Vulcan dockyard in Stettin." HRS claim that the ship was built in Danzig by Schichau. page 124. Please check
  • Armament at construction does not match for the SK-8.8 cm guns. HRS states only 20 guns, article infobox states 22 while text says 20
  • Alfred Saalwächter was her commander from September 1927 to September 1928 page 125

CommentsSupport from Peacemaker67 (send... over) 10:49, 3 May 2013 (UTC)[reply]

  • In the lead: "Afterward..." makes it sound like after the war.
    • How does it read now?
  • The lead, infobox and WWII section are not consistent regarding her fate. The lead says she hit a mine and partially sank but does not give her final fate, the infobox says her crew destroyed her in 1945, and the WWII section says she was scrapped insitu between 49-56. Please clarify.
    • Should be straightened out now.
  • unless I'm missing something (which is quite possible...) she didn't have any 5.9cm guns and neither did Pinguin. Could you review your sources on this?
    • Hmm - don't know how 15cm got changed to 5.9cm. Odd.
  • where were the torpedo tubes mounted in her hull, broadside amidships?
    • Added.
  • suggest "and she had a 40 mm..."
    • Sounds fine to me.
  • suggest you link Wilhelmshaven
    • Done
  • "line of battle" has a duplicate link
    • Fixed
  • suggest "of the naval war" should probably just be "of the war" unless the naval war is defined as starting at a different time from the war itself?
    • Sounds good to me.
  • suggest "the ship was deployed to guard the German Bight to guard the area
    • Much better, thanks.
  • suggest "followed in on 17–18 and 21–23 April 1915, of the month
    • Works for me.
  • suggest adding a hyphen here "in-between"
    • I'm not sure it's needed there - might Dank have the answer?
  • "Schlesien could barely make out a target in the darkness, as could several of her sisters", suggest "Schlesien and several of her sisters could barely make out a target in the darkness, as could several of her sisters
    • Sounds good to me.
  • what is an "8-point turn"?
  • a query really, do ships marcH? I thought they steamed or sailed?
    • It's another way to put it. And for even more confusion, the Germans usually use the verb marschieren and derivations thereof (such as aufmarsch) for this type of thing.
  • why no "SMS" for Von der Tann?
    • I usually don't use the prefix apart from the first instance in the lead (and of course for ships of foreign navies) - I've removed the one for Derfflinger
  • suggest "considerably strengthened so they could to be used"
    • Sounds good to me.
  • no alt text on images (not an ACR requirement)
  • confirm all other toolbox checks are green (no action required)
  • could you add a location to Leonard et al in the refs?
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:WikiProject_Military_history/Assessment/SMS_Schlesien&oldid=553917796"