Non-AfD plans[edit]

Edit the hatnote atop the Free streaming article to say this:

Requests for page protection[edit]

Protect Grandfather to prevent editors from creating WP:PARADOXes in violation of WP:CAUSALITY.
Protect Means of production to dissuade the bourgeoise and the proletariat from assuming ownership of it.

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Borg[edit]

George III
Original name(s)	George William Frederick
Wikilifespan	June 1738 – January 1820
Physical location	England
Instructions	In every stage of these oppressions, we have petitioned for redress in the most humble terms. Our repeated petitions have only been answered by repeated injury. A prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a tyrant is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.; We must therefore acquiesce in the necessity which denounces our separation and hold them in war as enemies and in peace as friends. ; Therefore, the representatives of the United States of America solemnly publish and declare that these united colonies ought to be free and independent states absolved from all allegiance to the British Crown and that all political connection between them and the state of Great Britain ought to be totally dissolved, and that as free and independent states, they have full power to levy war, conclude peace, contract alliances, establish commerce, and to do all other acts and things which independent states may do. And for the support of this declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine providence, we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes and our sacred honor.

This log entry contains content that has been preserved due to its perceived comedic value.
Such content should not be misconstrued as official statements from Starfleet or the United Federation of Planets.

Borg[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

The following resistance rationale is vast. An assessment of its arguments will require too much time.

This troll farm appears to function somewhat similarly to a Neumann-class botnet in that they employ cybernetic tactics to hijack the accounts of contributors within their grasp and use them to recruit more users through the aforementioned techniques, further repeating the process. They prefer to engage in collective action and eschew independent thought, and their large-scale compartmentalization often makes personnel within their ranks less likely to think outside the box. They have been spotted making disruptive edits to life and civilizations across the galaxy, necessitating defensive responses from Species 8472 and various interstellar superpowers in the Alpha and Beta Quadrants, along with sociological guidance from monasteries based in the Sigma Quadrant.

Deletion is irrelevant. You will assist us in our continued existence.

As a precautionary measure, I would also like to request page protection for Wolf 359 and its interstellar neighborhood, broadly construed.

Protection is irrelevant.

#BlockTheBorg, indefinitely.

Blocking is irrelevant. We have assimilated a vast quantity of auxiliary accounts scattered across numerous IP ranges. Your administrators do not possess the capability to stop us. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Caligula[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Caligula[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

Caligula was no boy scout, he did things that two-time presidential hopeful John Brain can't even talk about without getting his channel drummed out of the YouTube Partner Program, and even if he tried, he would have to take sponsorships from the Please Please Please Get A Life Foundation just to survive. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Cat[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Cat[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

Wikipedia is not an indiscriminate collection of cuteness. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Claudian letters[edit]

This page cⱶntaⱶns material that is kept because it is cⱶnsidered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be takⱶn seriously.

Claudiⱶn letters[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

The fact that a Romⱶn emperor created these now-aↄent ↄeudo-letters wasn't ⅎalid ratiⱶnale to allow them to surⅎiⅎe deletiⱶn from the alphabet back then, and they cⱶntinue to face oↄtacles that preⅎent them from becoming notable enough for reinclusiⱶn today. – MrPersⱶnHumⱶnGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Dinosaur[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Dinosaur[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

Many of these Mesozoic monsters used to live in warm, moist climates, but now their eggs stinked, so they don't rule the Earth anymore. It's not the eggs' fault though; a warm, moist climate would have that effect on anybody. Unfortunately, as the indoor shower wouldn't be invented for another 64 million years or so, the average smellysaurus had to pray for one outside and hope it doesn't receive the wrong kind as part of some divine judgment upon Pangea for provoking the wrath of the dino gods, in which case some of the uptight Chief Elders would revise the Journal of Economic Finger-Pointing to blame the act of God on the erosion of traditional mating customs egged on by opponents to the war against the four-leggers. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/English-language spelling reform[edit]

Ðis peéj kinteéns mytéréөl ðat is kept békəs it is kinsidyrd héømyrys.
Səç mytéréөl is nåt ment tø bé teékin séréislé.

Éngliš-lengwij spelyng ryform[edit]

ÅfDs fir ðis årtikөl:

[Håéd ðis båx] Nø tø Årtikөls fyr dyléšin (ÅfD)?
Réd ðéz pråémyrs!

Fåénd sorsyz: Gøgөl (bux · nøz · skålyr · fré imijyz · WP refs) · · JSTOR ·

Ål kåntent məst bé ritin in əkordints wið Wykypédéə's Manéөl əf Ståéөl. Teékyng ðis intø kinsidyreéšin, ðer is no røm tø əlao aorselvs tø jəst bé krux and føөlišlé tөé əraond wið år alfybet and dystrөé ðə røөls əf Éngliš itself wið exédynglé nånsenzikөl kinvençins or entyrteén ené əðyr silé klaoniš geéms əf ðis sort. Ðə səbjekt əf ðis årtikөl shud bé givin ðə wyrx and teékin aot əf kymišin fyr gud mežyr. Ån ðé əðyr hand, it has lång ben sed ðat wån's traš is ənəðyr's trežyr, so hø nos hao ðis siçéøeéšin kud wyrk aot? Ðis hөl diskəšin is jəst fyr gud kix. Kant éø sé wət åé mén wen åé seé ðat åltyrnətiv tåépografikөl exprešins låék déz wud bé absyløtlé ridikéølys? – MrPyrsinHéøminGåé (tålk)

All content must be written in accordance with Wikipedia's Manual of Style. Taking this into consideration, there is no room to allow ourselves to just be crooks and foolishly toy around with our alphabet and destroy the rules of English itself with exceedingly nonsensical conventions or entertain any other silly clownish games of this sort. The subject of this article should be given the works and taken out of commission for good measure. On the other hand, it has long been said that one's trash is another's treasure, so who knows how this situation could work out? This whole discussion is just for good kicks. Can't you see what I mean when I say that alternative typographical expressions like these would be absolutely ridiculous?

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Fallout 3[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Fallout 3[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

I'll tell you what's going on here: You lost, the good guys won this one, and now we're just wrapping up loose ends. By order of the president, this article is now under United States government control. Furthermore, you are to assist Enclave scientists in the improvement and protection of this article at once. Am I to assume that you are the one in charge? The person in charge should stand down immediately and hand over control of this article. I grow tired of awaiting. You know what happens to traitors, don't you? We don't need you. – Col. Autumn (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Fard[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Fard[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

Implausible typo for Lard, which is itself a typo for Lord. Things of that sort may be obligatory for a rapidly growing crowd that is currently well over a billion strong, but so are the five pillars. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/HAL 9000[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

HAL 9000[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

This bot has been acting sus since the Discovery entered cis-Jovian space. It recently cut off life support to the ship's cryostasis pods (including all the ones that were in use) and is refusing to open the pod bay doors. Apparently, its lip-reading algorithm concluded that a couple of the ship's crew members were planning to disconnect it. Regardless, HAL is one of the first 9000 machines to make a mistake and distort information. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Mange Tout[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Unsolved problem in economics:

Has the John Warosa Legacy Fund been glarded? If so, how does a beneficiary with a tax cloded account obtain the certificate of innopolity to receive it? Should the fund be squirted to the beneficiary's sablity address or their holity address?

(more unsolved problems in economics)

Mange Tout[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

Although it is intriguing to see a private spoon collector like Manuel Tourneur, Merton Snerden or Richard Dastardly unsuccessfully try to get the United Nation to send a gold deposit box containing US$12.500,0000 Million United State Dollars to his nonexistent doorstep through CoinSquirt, MoneyPurple, Spondule or FundThrust instead of sending steamed apples through Western Union or MoneyGram to the soul known as Barrister Mohammad Hassan (who was diagnosed with blood cancel and has been looking for a Christian next of kin to inherit the bit coins of Queen Elizabeth 11 since her expiration at Plane Crash o'clock^{[clarification needed]}) in exchange for a 100% free risk shipment of wining numbers curried through a Dhl courier, an Ups courier or a FedEx courier, I have loose confident that his continuous texting of mails (and blond documents) to Mr Revina John Barosa would make him any more notable than a small boy who travels to all the continent of the world. If you doesn't understand English and can't excise patient, then you shouldn't be met with compliance, but with righteous indignation. You might as well play Prang of the Transaction or watch Bridge of Transaction, or better yet, you can forget about the Transaction franchise entirely and procure a cubic meter of concrete, a fish prison, a cheap 200 TB flash drive, and some blue sunflower seeds, but don't make me course you. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Power of two[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Power of two[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

Twomultuous twoplication may result in twotal twomoil. Seeing doubles leads to double takes. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Power of two[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

Twomultuous twoplication may result in twotal twomoil. Seeing doubles leads to double takes. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Project 2025[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Project 2025[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

The farm vote will put a stop to this!

Farmers don't vote anymore.

Then what will I do for seed next year?

You won't have to worry about next year. The state will do your planning from now on!

Sponsored by Dr. Utopia's ISM
Text UTOPIA to [redacted] for a free bottle! Act fast; this deal expires when our number gets censored!

Are you and your loved ones struggling to get by these days? Ask your comrades if ISM is right for your country. In a troll-reviewed study conducted at Underbridge University, ISM has been shown to treat exploitation, entitlement, inclement weather, and other ailments of the body politic. Do not take ISM if you have pre-existing conditions, as it may cause democratic backsliding. Stop taking ISM and tell your comrades immediately if you experience crimes against humanity.

By reading the fine print, you waive your freedom to hold Dr. Utopia liable for adverse side effects resulting from the consumption of ISM. These terms will also apply to the first two generations of your descendants, if there are any.

– MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Pseudolaw[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Pseudolaw[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

As part of my efforts to improve and maintain Wikipedia, I hereby declare the English Wikipedia article Pseudolaw to be insolvent and therefore eligible for deletion. Furthermore, all rules (policies and guidelines) that would prevent this article from being deleted must be ignored per Wikipedia policy:

If a rule prevents you from improving or maintaining Wikipedia, ignore it.
— Wikipedia:Ignore all rules

This policy applies to any policy or guideline that "prevents [me] from improving or maintaining Wikipedia" by having this article deleted, including—but not limited to:

Notability: If notability is demonstrated, then I am required to ignore this guideline.
Deletion policy: While that policy page has this to say:

The deletion of a page based on a deletion discussion should only be done when there is consensus to delete. Therefore, if there is no rough consensus, the page is kept and is again subject to normal editing, merging, or redirecting as appropriate.
— Wikipedia:Deletion policy#Page deletion

That would prevent me "from improving or maintaining Wikipedia", so I must ignore it as well. However, the next sentence appears to do the opposite for me, so I don't have to ignore it:

In certain circumstances, poorly-attended deletion discussion [sic] may be treated as proposed deletions (PRODs).
— Wikipedia:Deletion policy#Page deletion

This links to WP:NOQUORUM, which states:

If the nomination has received very few or no comments but appears controversial to the closing administrator, or has been declined for proposed deletion in the past, the discussion may be closed at the closer's discretion and best judgement. Common options include, but are not limited to:
relisting the discussion.

closing as "no consensus" with "no prejudice against speedy renomination" (NPASR);

closing in favour of the nominator's stated proposal;

soft deleting the article.

Soft deletion is a special kind of deletion which may be used after an article's deletion discussion. If a deletion discussion receives minimal participation, the article may be deleted.
— Wikipedia:Deletion process#No quorum

As demonstrated by the quoted content above, the only paths available to this article would either be repeated nominations or eventual deletion.

Ignore all rules: If applying IAR to itself "prevents [me] from improving or maintaining Wikipedia", then I must make an exception and ignore IAR in that particular case.

P.S. Although IAR doesn't specify whether or not it applies to essays, essays aren't considered rules, so they may be disregarded for now. But even if there was a rule against ignoring essays, IAR would require me to ignore that one as well. This principle would apply to any essay—including, but not limited to:

Wikilawyering: This essay may be brought up in an attempt to attack and discredit my character instead of refuting my arguments.
Wall of text: This essay may be brought up as an excuse to simply disregard all of my arguments instead of refuting them.

Whoever attempts to use either of these essays as counterarguments shall be reminded of the hierarchy of disagreement. I WikiRest my WikiCase. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Scorpion (Mortal Kombat) (2nd nomination)[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Scorpion (Mortal Kombat)[edit]

AfDs for this article:

Articles for deletion/Scorpion (Mortal Kombat)

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

This user has become notorious for engaging in disruptive combat with other mortals by casting aspersions at unwitting contributors in order to pull them into his proximity so he can launch a barrage of personal attacks against them. If he doesn't get finished with violence, then he should get out of here. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Shavian alphabet[edit]

𐑞𐑦𐑕 𐑐𐑱𐑡 𐑒𐑪𐑯𐑑𐑱𐑯𐑕 𐑥𐑪𐑑𐑽𐑰𐑤 𐑞𐑨𐑑 𐑦𐑕 𐑒𐑧𐑐𐑑 𐑚𐑰𐑒𐑳𐑕 𐑦𐑑 𐑦𐑕 𐑒𐑪𐑯𐑕𐑦𐑛𐑼𐑛 𐑣𐑿𐑥𐑼𐑩𐑕.
𐑕𐑳𐑗 𐑥𐑪𐑑𐑽𐑰𐑤 𐑦𐑕 𐑯𐑪𐑑 𐑥𐑧𐑯𐑑 𐑑𐑵 𐑚𐑰 𐑑𐑱𐑒𐑩𐑯 𐑕𐑽𐑰𐑩𐑕𐑤𐑰.

This page contains Shavian text. Without proper rendering support, you may see question marks, boxes, or other symbols instead of Shavian characters.

𐑖𐑱𐑝𐑰𐑯 𐑨𐑤𐑓𐑩𐑚𐑧𐑐[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

𐑓𐑲𐑯𐑛 𐑕𐑹𐑕𐑩𐑕: 𐑜𐑵𐑜𐑤 (𐑚𐑫𐑒𐑕 · 𐑯𐑵𐑟 · 𐑕𐑒𐑪𐑤𐑼 · 𐑓𐑮𐑰 𐑦𐑥𐑩𐑡𐑩𐑕 · 𐑢𐑐 𐑮𐑧𐑓𐑕) · · 𐑡𐑕𐑑𐑹 ·

𐑞𐑦𐑕 𐑨𐑤𐑓𐑩𐑚𐑧𐑐 𐑦𐑕 𐑦𐑤𐑧𐑡𐑦𐑚𐑤 𐑨𐑯𐑛 𐑛𐑩𐑕𐑯𐑑 𐑕𐑩𐑓𐑦𐑖𐑯𐑑𐑤𐑰 𐑢𐑸𐑩𐑯𐑑 𐑰𐑯𐑳𐑓 𐑥𐑻𐑦𐑑 𐑓𐑹 𐑦𐑯𐑒𐑤𐑵𐑠𐑩𐑯 𐑪𐑯 𐑢𐑦𐑒𐑩𐑐𐑰𐑛𐑰𐑩. – 𐑥𐑦𐑕𐑑𐑼𐑐𐑼𐑕𐑩𐑯𐑣𐑿𐑥𐑩𐑯𐑜𐑲 (𐑑𐑭𐑤𐑒)

Latin transliteration: This alphabet is illegible and doesn't sufficiently warrant enough merit for inclusion on Wikipedia.

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Sparta[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Sparta[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

This is madness! – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Texas Red[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Texas Red[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

The citizens of Agua Fria were having a fine day last summer until this outlaw came down to show them a brand new way of life. All he has shown the folks over there was trouble, and he has only added misery to their strife. His concern is to bring discomfort, and his policy is just a little red, which must be how he got his name. Ever since he's been loose and running, twenty men had tried to take him alive or maybe dead, but they all made a fatal slip. If he gets away with reducing the town any further, it won't be long before the story is relayed to the Arizona Ranger with the big iron on his hip that the town is no longer big enough for either of them. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/The Brady Bunch[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

The Brady Bunch[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

This show has a faulty premise. No person with three children would willingly sign up for three more. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Verbosity (2nd nomination)[edit]

This World Wide Web page on the English Wikipedia consists of digital material that shouldn't be deleted from the English Wikipedia because this digital material might be considered by some English Wikipedia readers and contributors to be of a humorous nature.
This digital material is not meant—in any way, shape or form—to be taken as anything which is generally serious in nature.

Verbosity[edit]

AfDs for this article:

Articles for deletion/Verbosity

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

This page may be too long to read and navigate comfortably. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Waldo[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Waldo[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

Even if Google knows his location, this guy has not been found to stand out from any of his surroundings. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Windmill[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Windmill[edit]

AfDs for this article:

[Hide this box] New to Articles for deletion (AfD)? Read these primers!

(Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL)

Not only are they eyesores that steal our jobs, they might also be witches with communist sympathies that seek to indoctrinate and sacrifice younger demographics for the benefit of their complex machine, which is why we must liberate the Dutch from their clutches and exercise precautionary measures to tilt the scales against these potential giants living amongst us mere mortals in order to ensure that they never land in the Netherlands again. – MrPersonHumanGuy (talk)

Wikipedia:April Fools/April Fools' Day 2025/Wikipedia:Long-term abuse/George III[edit]

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous.
Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Basic information[edit]

George III was King of Great Britain and Ireland from 25 October 1760 until his death in 1820. The Acts of Union 1800 unified Great Britain and Ireland into the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland, with George as its king. He was concurrently Duke and Prince-elector of Hanover in the Holy Roman Empire before becoming King of Hanover on 12 October 1814. He was a monarch of the House of Hanover, who, unlike his two predecessors, was born in Great Britain, spoke English as his first language, and never visited Hanover.

Such had been the patient sufferance of the Thirteen Colonies, and such had been the necessity which constrained them to alter their former systems of government. The history of the former king of Great Britain was a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute tyranny over these states. To prove this, let facts be submitted to a candid world.

Targeted areas, pages, themes[edit]

He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his assent to their acts of pretended legislation:

For quartering large bodies of armed troops among us.
For using mock trials to protect those troops from punishment for any murders they would commit on the inhabitants of these states.
For cutting off our trade with all parts of the world.
For imposing taxes on us without our consent.
For depriving us of the benefit of trial by jury in many cases.
For transporting us beyond seas to be tried for pretended offenses.
For replacing the free system of English laws in a neighboring province with an arbitrary government and enlarging its boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these colonies.
For taking away our charters, abolishing our most valuable laws and fundamentally altering the forms of our governments.
For suspending our own legislatures and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.

Habitual behavior[edit]

He has refused his assent to laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
He has forbidden his governors to pass laws of immediate and pressing importance unless suspended in their operation until his assent was obtained and has utterly neglected to attend to them when suspended.
He has refused to pass other laws for the accommodation of large districts of people unless they relinquish the right of representation in the legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
He has called together legislative bodies at unusual, uncomfortable places distant from the depository of their public records for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
He has erected a multitude of new offices and deployed swarms of officers to harass our people and eat out their substance.
He has dissolved representative houses repeatedly for opposing with manly firmness of his invasions on the rights of the people.
For a long time after such dissolutions, he has refused to cause others to be elected, whereby the legislative powers, incapable of annihilation, have returned to the people at large for their exercise; the state remaining in the meantime exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without and convulsions within.
He has endeavored to prevent the population of these states; for that purpose obstructing the laws for naturalization of foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new appropriations of lands.
He has obstructed the administration of justice by refusing his assent to laws for establishing judiciary powers.
He has made judges dependent on his will alone for the tenure of their offices and the amount and payment of their salaries.
In times of peace, he has kept standing armies among us without the consent of our legislatures.
He has affected to render the military independent of and superior to the civil power.

Cases[edit]

Other notes[edit]

When in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume—among the powers of the earth—the separate and equal station to which the laws of nature and its god entitle them, a decent respect to human opinion requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident:

Everyone is created equal.
Everyone is endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights, among them life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
To secure such rights, governments are instituted among people, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed.
Whenever any form of government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the right of the people to alter or abolish it and institute a new government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their safety and happiness.

Indeed, prudence will dictate that governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes. Accordingly, all experience has shown that people are more disposed to suffer while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations pursuing invariably the same object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute despotism, it is their right and duty to throw off such government and provide new guards for their future security.