The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Cwmhiraeth (talk) 07:42, 14 January 2018 (UTC)
Invalid status "Y" - use one of "y", "?", "maybe", "no" or "again"
* Second Review: New enough, long enough, neutrally written, well referenced, no close paraphrasing seen. Hook ref verified and cited inline. QPQ done.
I would suggest adding to the hook the fact that it's celebrated in schools:
Thanks, I very much like both of your hooks. The only possible issue with the second one is that every day in state schools in Washington specifically, or the United States generally, includes refraining from alcohol. While it may be true Temperance and Good Citizenship Day does not always involve evangelism of prohibition, normal rules that require K-12 students refrain from alcohol still apply on that day. Chetsford (talk) 00:06, 8 January 2018 (UTC)
OK, do you have any other ideas to spice up the hook? Otherwise we could go with ALT0a. Yoninah (talk) 00:19, 8 January 2018 (UTC)
I love Alt0A! You might want to consider amending "celebrated" to "observed", though, as I think "celebrated" may communicate a slightly more festive atmosphere than one might normally find on a holiday called Temperance Day? EDIT - nevermind, misread "commemorated"! Chetsford (talk) 00:38, 8 January 2018 (UTC)
OK, thanks. I don't mind changing it to "observed"; that sounds better and it's shorter. Reiterating tick for ALT0a. Yoninah (talk) 20:00, 8 January 2018 (UTC)
Per discussion at WT:DYK#12-hour cycle, neither the sources or the article refer to this as a "holiday", but a civic observance. Yoninah (talk) 13:16, 9 January 2018 (UTC)
Thanks, Yoninah. I've provided three alts as above. Zero-B is probably the most correct but it reads rather clumsy. Zero-C is probably the least correct as it's not a "civic observance in schools", it's a statewide civic observance, there is just a specific legal mandate that schools undertake certain activities on that day. Zero-D probably splits the difference. EDIT - On further review of the sources, I actually think Zero-C is most accurate. Chetsford (talk) 06:47, 11 January 2018 (UTC)
@Chetsford: thanks for the alts. But ALT0c is not a hook; it's just a statement of fact, and after you read it, you don't have to click on the article. You could condense it to -- ... that Temperance and Good Citizenship Day is observed today in schools in the U.S. state of Washington? -- but even that is not a hook! Yoninah (talk) 15:10, 11 January 2018 (UTC)
I thought the fact that they tried to get rid of the day in 2013 but only ended up making it stronger might make a good hook, or perhaps one noting that schools are to hold voter registration drives for eligible students on the day. Here's one with the registration drives, which I find more interesting than the required educational programming mentioned in the article; someone else can attempt the strengthening of the law regarding the Day:
I've used "expected" rather than the "requiring" the article indicates. The highline.org source cited (#7) uses the word "expectation", not at all the same thing, and the other source (#5) which points to a page about the bill doesn't have anything about the actual enacted wording. Note that sources 7 and 8 are very similar pages, with #8 being the state's Superintendent of Public Instruction page—in a number of phrases and sentences they are identical—and in addition to the Day's second paragraph's "expectation", there's also the final sentence of the final paragraph: With the 2013 addition, schools are asked to provide eligible students with the opportunity to register to vote. That doesn't sound like a requirement to me. BlueMoonset (talk) 18:24, 12 January 2018 (UTC)
Hello Yoninah and BlueMoonset. I'm very sorry I'm so late in replying. Anyway, I very much like BlueMoonset's ALT2 and think it's supported by the sources! Thank you both for your help. Chetsford (talk) 09:04, 13 January 2018 (UTC)
Thank you, BlueMoonset, ALT2 is great. Hook ref verified and cited inline. I added a link to the hook. ALT2 good to go. Yoninah (talk) 19:56, 13 January 2018 (UTC)
* Second Review: New enough, long enough, neutrally written, well referenced, no close paraphrasing seen. Hook ref verified and cited inline. QPQ done.
OK, thanks. I don't mind changing it to "observed"; that sounds better and it's shorter. Reiterating tick for ALT0a. Yoninah (talk) 20:00, 8 January 2018 (UTC)
