Template:Did you know nominations/Charlie Bartson
- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Theleekycauldron (talk) 21:35, 9 December 2021 (UTC)
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Charlie Bartson
... that Charlie Bartson was recommended for release from the Chicago Pirates of the Players' League after getting drunk and verbally abusing Cap Anson at a game Bartson attended during an off-day? Source: [1], p. 12
5x expanded by Therapyisgood (talk). Self-nominated at 17:19, 29 November 2021 (UTC).
@Therapyisgood: Nominated on the same day it was expanded from 260 bytes to about 3400 bytes, satisfying date and length criteria. The text states "over 251.1 innings pitched", but the source indicates 253.1. Although I can access portions of refs 3, 4, and 5, I cannot access the pages specifically used for citations, so I'll assume good faith for those sources. I did manage to verify some statements by perusing other baseball books. (Not needed for DYK, but the sentence "Bartson stood at 6 feet..." seems to have been tacked onto a paragraph at random.) The hook is long, albeit just under the limit of 200 characters, and has a citation to one of the sources I cannot access. It also assumes the audience knows this is about baseball (only baseball fans with a knowledge of the game's history would recognize Cap Anson, and most would not recognize the team or league). I think it could be modified to be much shorter, such as:
ALT1: ... that after getting drunk and verbally abusing Cap Anson at a baseball game during his off day, Charlie Bartson was recommended for release from the Chicago Pirates?
- The drawback to this one is it places the subject near the end; I'd also prune "recommended for", as he was released. My only other concern is that about 3/4 of this article is basically the BBREF page expanded into prose, with the remainder consisting of a few (sourced) anecdotes, but at least these make up about 1300-1400 bytes of text. (By the way, this source states "...recommended his release because "his work was not of such a kind as to warrant his retention" anyway", which is an interesting tidbit to add to the article.) QPQ completed.
- So, fix the stats error, perhaps add a little more text to nudge the non-stats part over 1500 bytes, and consider either ALT1 or your own rewording of it (or an entirely different hook). Mindmatrix 01:54, 1 December 2021 (UTC)
- @Mindmatrix: added prose, alt 1 looks good to me with "recommended for" removed, so: ... that after getting drunk and verbally abusing Cap Anson at a baseball game during his off day, Charlie Bartson was released from the Chicago Pirates?
I've added "baseball player" for context.looking back it's redundant. Therapyisgood (talk) 02:38, 1 December 2021 (UTC)
@Therapyisgood: I've rewritten the modified hook as ALT2 and stricken the earlier versions to clarify for the promoter. Good to go. Mindmatrix 23:00, 1 December 2021 (UTC)
- ALT2: ... that after getting drunk and verbally abusing Cap Anson at a baseball game during his off day, Charlie Bartson was released from the Chicago Pirates?
- @Mindmatrix: added prose, alt 1 looks good to me with "recommended for" removed, so: ... that after getting drunk and verbally abusing Cap Anson at a baseball game during his off day, Charlie Bartson was released from the Chicago Pirates?
